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Wishing a very happy birthday to Silver! Happy many returns! *Dougal cuddles*
 
 
 
 
 
 
( You are about to view content that may not be appropriate for minors. )
 
 
 
 
 
 
I feel unpopular and unaccomplished.

Posting this feels like I'm whining at people to pay attention to me so I can be a magical special snowflake.

I _do_ want to be a magical special snowflake. I'd be lying if I said otherwise.. But more than that, I want to understand what it is in me that keeps me from making many friends and drives away the few that I do manage to get.

Most often, when I'm alone, I'm happy. I could work on art and write to myself and build things almost endlessly but when I hit moments where I'm between projects or I can't work on my own things (like at work) I start to fade. I want to talk with people, share ideas, learn new things. I want to be stimulated by something external to myself. Books, tv, and all that are nice but they're one-way communication devices. I can't easily ask them questions or tell them about something they made me think of.

Wish I knew how to have and keep friends. All the stuff they teach you as a child about how to be a 'good person' does not seem to make one likable. Or maybe it's just me. :/
 
 
 
 
 
 
Tweet-tweet. )
 
 
 
 
 
 
Pair of US Army officers chain themselves to the White House gate today, to protest idiotic military bigotry.
 
 
 
 
 
 
"It makes a sound like God Himself getting an erection. You know, a faint thrumming whirrr and a little halo?"

So, my graphics card threw a heat sink and needed to be replaced under warranty.

They didn't have any more of my cards, so they sent me a replacement.

My Nvidia GeForce GTX 295 and I are going to have a little bit of ALONE TIME together now.

HO-LEE-SHIT.
 
 
 
 
 
 
A few months back, in a crisis of confidence, I tanked all the stuff I had on my FA account, and I also took it a step further and unfollowed everyone I was watching. (this is very hard to do on FA, since you have to do it one at a time, you can't just 'select all' the way you can with most modern interfaces.)

Since doing that, google reader's kind of supplanted FA as my primary source of art exposure. I started with Drawn.ca and whenever they'd link to somebody with art that I really liked, nine times out of ten, they'd have a blogger or flickr account that they were posting their artwork to, and I'd add them to the pile. So now most of the stuff I'm being exposed to is this really diverse collection of pro work, and it's hard to describe what the difference feels like.

It's like sticking a periscope up from FA's extraordinarily poisonous and self-selecting user community to be reminded that there's a larger world out there where people care about their craft, and aren't playing to an audience, and don't upload picture after picture of wolf/fox hybrids with bat wings and elfquest eyes and imageboard catchphrases made up to look like whatever their favorite TF2 character is. After being involved with FA so long, I'm finding out (again) that it's okay to not try to emulate the FA house style, because what is very successful there is actually very niche in the larger world. It is a breath of fresh air.
 
 
 
 
 
 
This is the TEST shipment you asked for



LoudTwitter
 
 
 
 
 
 
[info]mwbard is being removed from all support. While he can breathe on his own, CT/MRI scans show extensive damage. He'll be put on painkillers till he passes away. His boyfriend Jacob is in town, and has visited with him, noting that Michael was responsive to light, and to his touch. He met Michael's family for the first time.

Jacob writes in his blog:
They all smiled when they heard about how many people were concerned with him. They always were worried about how lonely Morgan could be but they were so happy to know he was loved.


That's all one can say, I suppose. Goodbye, Michael. You never steered me wrong when it came to lending me a book, or pointing me to a bit of fiction.
 
 
 
 
 
 
(reposting this since I work there too >.>)

My company is hiring a UNIX and Storage admin in the Secaucus, New Jersey area. Private message me if you are interested.

Description:
We will be hiring one full time senior skill level UNIX administrator to install, and manage the ongoing operations of a PoP (Point of Presence) in a datacenter located in Secaucus, New Jersey. This PoP will serve east coast customers who subscribe to our service. The environment will consist of approximately 10 racks of servers and storage arrays, network gear, and management infrastructure. The ideal candidate will be responsible for maintaining operations of this PoP within corporate specifications for SLA and standards compliance. Some rare travel may be necessary.

Requirements:

- 5 yrs experience as a Linux systems administration,
- Debian, and Solaris focus is a benefit.
- Virtualization experience, XEN experience a benefit.
- Strong fundamental LAN, and WAN knowledge, especially with VLAN, MSDI, LACP, dot1q...
- Strong SAN knowledge with a focus on iSCSI, SAN Booting, etc.
- Strong NAS knowledge in NFS, and CIFS, TFTP, PXE boot
- Strong local attach storage skills in Linux LVM, MD software RAID, OS booting.
- Access protocols and tools such as WebDAV, FTP, SFTP, SCP, rsync
- Strong coding or scripting in some common language (C, C++, Perl, Shell scripting, etc)
- Familiar with Subversion (SVN), and code reviews, change control processes.
- Strong written, and verbal communication skills.
- Experience with asset management, inventory, and lifecycle management
- Able to work alone, self starter, and motivated to take initiative, and work with people geographically diverse regions across multiple time zones.
 
 
 
 
 
 
That there liberal slanted media I hear about so often is waving around the 940 billion dollar health bill, which is apparently the bills new name. In the fine print near the bottom they bring up the trivial fact that, the bill costs 940 billion dollars over ten years, which is 138 billion less than we were projected to spend on health care in the current system during that time.

I'm sure that framing the cost of a decade worth of public services as if its the one-year cost, and concealing the fact that it's actually a price reduction all serves some liberal agenda somehow, right? Or maybe they're trying to preserve their journalistic neutrality by not shattering the right-wing talking point about the "cost" of the bill? After all, promoting understanding of factual data would pretty much shatter the right's case against the reform.
 
 
 
 
 
 
God, I love Sigourney Weaver. She is so so good at being Scary Lady.

In other news, arrrrrgh. Work is arghly. Home life has been somewhat similar, with the happy exception of [info]velos being awesome, although I still think I was too exhausted and broken-feeling to be good company. Still, good times were had. I got to wander around Shepherd's Bush with him, stealing Thai food.

There's been a lack of [info]terrana, and a surfeit of games and art and such. Nothing really presentable, 'cept for the chameleon-thingy. Mostly holding fire and keeping myself as grounded as I can. With winter finally releasing its cruel hold, the mornings are getting a bit more manageable, and the temperature's actually in double-digits again. All this is good. I have things to look forward to! Who can ask for more than that, mm?

I'm fed up of being miserable. I'm going to be happy instead, I think, even in the face of work wanting to shift everyone on to a ten-hour-per-day sort of schedule, which will absolutely kill me. Bah at that!
 
 
 
 
 
 
lj-tags: sxsw
 
 
 
 
 
 
Intellectually, I know there is more to Mississauga than parking lots and boring corporate architecture. But man, that's sure all I can see when I look out the windows here. Parking lots, business hotels, and those horribly boring single story corporate HQs.
 
 
 
 
 
 
lj-tags: sxsw
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
The following are the tweets of the accused. The names and faces have been changed to protect the stupid.

12:39 I am at the Rancho Cucamonga @bestbuy today! Come get your deals!

19:45 Dag yo, what a nice day today.

21:16 Man, moving all that equipment...I need to buy a 2nd Xbox!

21:55 Playing Halo 3. raptr.com/JPSylvrWolfe

Automatically shipped by LoudTwitter
 
 
 
 
 
 

 
 
 
 
 
 
This is brilliant. I doubt this gesture will convince people how pathetic, how self-destructive, how anti-American the Supreme Court's ruling was. But you can hope and every little bit counts, right?

http://economix.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/02/02/corporation-says-it-will-run-for-congress/
 
 
 
 
 
 
Although I guess using it that way would work pretty well ...



(To save you googling it yourself, etaoin shrdlu is a typesetting reference -- but is also a band's name, and 'mating calls' is their album.)
 
 
 
 
 
 

Originally published at Imagine Your Reality. Please leave any comments there.

Four Square is a very popular social media application that people use to indicate where they are, and also win virtual prizes in the process. There’s only one problem with four square, which many people don’t recognize. It tells everyone who’s following you on it, where you are, when you post. The issue with that is if someone decides to rob your house or stalk you or do anything else along those lines it’s very easy to know where you are.

So many social media consultants push tools such as four square without really thinking about the ramifications of using it. It doesn’t matter to me that four square is the hip new social media site to use. I’d rather not provide people a way to find out where I am, unless I’m planning to meet those people already.

Perhaps another way to put this is: “Just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you should.” In other words, just because you can post on Four Square where your location is doesn’t mean its a good idea or that you should. No matter what shiny virtual rewards you get, I somehow doubt four square will really do anything if your home gets robbed, or something bad happens to you, because someone decided to use your location against you.

Before getting on any social media site, ask yourself what information you’ll post, and if it that information can be used against you. If it can be used against you, such as posting where you are, it may not be so wise to do so. Just because you can do it, doesn’t mean you should, or that it’s wise to do so. And no matter how popular a social media site is, if it compromises your safety, it’s not worth it.

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This is an even worse idea than it sounds.
 
 
 
 
 
 
Leading tonight's frenzy of fun is lunch notes from the permanent roommate, where not only do you know which lunch is yours, you get some very fun commentary with it.

After that, The Muppet Throwdown - the only bracket that matters.

Topping that, however, is the apartment designed with a wall that lets almost all of the space be used for whatever room needs to be used at the moment, thanks to movable walls mounted with things like trays to pull out, books to have, and a fold-down bed. The walls allow for 24 different configurations, based on what is needed. Designed in the very cramped quarters of East Asia, it could find worldwide appeal.

The best of the bunch, however, is Iggy Pop's two-finger salute as acknowledgement of the induction of the Stooges into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Because Punk does not grow any less punk as it gets older.

Japan also has legends of the fate Jimmy Hoffa was rumored to have met, with humans buried alive in structures, either because of being criminals, or sacrifices, or because they contracted diseases.

Our professional hackles go straight up at a student accused of stealing and then trying to sell historical documents in the archives of his university. The dealer got suspicious when the documents he requested as a sample were not packaged well and damaged in transit. We know that college is expensive, but raiding and trying to sell the historical documents collection is not the way to go about it.

Out in the world, the Catholic Church won an exemption today allowing them to deny homosexuals the ability to adopt through their agencies, possibly because the Church threatened to stop doing the work they wree doing if they weren't allowed to discriminate based on their interpretation of the teachings.

United States Attorney General Eric Holder, Jr. said that if the United States were to read the constitutional protections afforded to criminals to Osama bin Laden, they would be read to his corpse.

Domestically, I can almost hear the conservative rumblings as Salon explores how the newly food stamp'd can still maintain some organics and such in their diet. Perhaps because they don't like the assistance, or perhaps because they will conclude that if someone can manage to get organics and soy alternatives, instead of instant noodles and day old bread, the benefit is clearly too much. That said, they can take pride in that there's still some amount of unease about whether to apply, even if more and more are applying and using their food stamps to maintain their food lifestyle. (It's actually often pretty healthy and cooked using fresh ingredients.) As a further goad or measure of "d00d, how do they do that", observe the following infographics: RDA vs. federal subsidies on the major food groups. Following on from that, one of the hipsters from the "new people on food stamps" article in Salon responds to the accusations of laziness and worthlessness from the comment squad, pointing out that many of the "hipsters" on food stamps also carry jobs, jobs that are insecure and provide no benefits at all.

So let's talk a bit about "pulling oneself up by one's bootstraps". It's actually harder to shift social classes upward in the United States than it is in most European countries. Inequality is pretty high. Americans believe highly in the concept of social mobility, however, and that its easy to do. This make mean that we tolerate a lot worse inequality because we think it's easy to overcome.

Now that we have the luxury of investigating fully, when e-mails from Nidal Malik Hasan's superiors appear that indicate worry and suspicion that he's not cut out to be military material, we can say "Why didn't they stop him then?!" and feel properly like the disaster that happened was preventable. Because humans like to feel like they have control and that if they only do certain things or a certain way, misfortune will not befall them. It requires, however, humans not acting like humans, so it'll never happen.

The 3rd Circuit Court of Appeals ruled that a teenager that sent nude pictures of herself to a friend (who then betrayed her trust and sent it on further) cannot be compelled, upon pain of felony charges, to attend a class on gender roles and to write an essay on why it was wrong of her to do so. It did not rule whether or not those teenagers involved in "sexting" could be charged with a felony anyway, so it's still more than possible for a DA to get their pound of flesh, they just have to take all the blood with it.

Have some information about the demographics of married same-sex couples in the United States. It's actually a rather higher percentage of those couples mentioned than I would have thought. I also wonder how many closeted couples there are that wouldn't respond in the affirmative. That said, there is some amount of acceptance in the world when one can openly parody major comic book pairings by having the characters in the hero's harem start marrying each other instead of him.

The push to pass the health care reform bill begins in earnest, with the CW trying to figure out whether, despite being short some votes now, the House can whip up enough to pass the Senate bill and then the reconciliation measure. The President picked up some cred today in engaging someone who doesn't agree with him. Representative Bart Stupak and his anti-abortion crusade, on th eother hand, are definitley dimming, with a letter from a group representing 59,000 nuns sent to the Congresscritters to pass the bill, already. The Representative dismissed the letter and demonstrated the male-centric arrogance he displays around abortions, saying that he doesn't "call up the nuns" and instead prefers "leading bishops, Focus on the Family, and The National Right to Life Committee". Thank you, Representative Stupak, for that clear and object lesson on who you consult for women's issues - other men. This is not supposed to be Afghanistan, Mr. Stupak.

As the unemployment rate continues to hold steady, the administration in charge continues to take more heat for not finding the magic that brings the rate down.

The Department of the Obvious has a great poll for you - people are currently less concerned abotu global warming than in the past. Perhaps the immediateness of possible unemployment, loss of health care, and other such things are interfering with their long-term vision.

Last out, PETA is (now/still) considered a terrorist organization.

Playing in technology, China has warned Google to comply with their censorship requirements. Google is, as of this posting, still flying them the bird.

The thieves are getting better and better, having managed to replace card transaction terminals in a store with those that allowed for the skimming of data, and nobody was the wiser for quite a while. Elsewhere, a hacker accessed the system installed by some dealers into cars that permit them to brick the cars or honk their horns as reminders or punishment for nonpayment. First of all, why are such things being installed in cars in the first place? The more remote tech there is, the more likely it is someone will use that remote tech in a very bad way. Well, there's also the part where Myspace decided it wanted to sell off the user data everyone has contributed to it in bulk, although we doubt anything personal-personal was included. The question now is whether the others will join in, or the backlash against MySpace will preclude the others from doing so.

Government agencies have been disobeying the directives of their President, continuing to hide and make exemptions to Freedom of Information Act requests, for significantly more events than his predecessor. Thus is government - one person says one thing, someone else does another, and the first person might get blamed for the second person's actions.

Finally, mammalian regeneration possible? Gene p21 seems to be the one that controls regrowth - its absence might be the reason why some mammal species can regrow and some cannot</a>.

In the opinions, Dr. Kengor on Gorbachev, how what he did brought about the end of the USSR, if unintentionally, and why conservatives and liberals alike have flawed narratives of the events. On the other side of the Cold War, Mr. Devine offers a realistic treatment of Ronald Reagan and his policies on peace.

Mr. Kang undermines his and Don Imus's attempts to brand Tom Hanks as anti-American by admitting that he has a point. That point is supposed to be subordinate to purer, higher interests, and the quote the select has interpretations that I think Occam likes better, so I don't think it's quite up to the level of sound argument.

And back once again to domestic health care, where Mr. Darling says that the Democrats are bending the rules and President Obama is a hardcore liberal because he's willing to use any tactc he can to get something passed. So... he lied to the country with false promises of weapons of mass destruction so he and the contractors behind his vice-president could invade a country in the Middle East? Because if he hasn't gotten to that point at least, I'd say he's not willing to use every tactic. Oh, wait, they're doctrinaire liberals because they keep "ignoring" the polls and the elections and everything else. Uh, no. There's been lots of attempts at coperation and "listening", probably more than there should have been. Mr. Pruden does a little better, suggesting that Congressional Democrats are fleeing the President and health care because they're certain they'll take a beating in the election if they stand by him. Mind you, he does so by referring to Speaker Pelosi as a "dominatrix" of the House and that the plan is a "government takeover" of health care. The first conjures images that would be most interesting to see, the second is a lie. Mr. Barone can't find enough votes for the House to pass anything, by his mathematics. The result of such things? An exhortation to Pass the Damn Bill. Even if, as Mr. Fund point outs, this means the precarious position of passing a bill that everyone hates and trusting that the amendments and reconciliations will go through instead of stall out. On that point, The Times, unsigned, says the bill can be beat if it stays delayed long enough for yet more fake grassroots mobs to make their presence felt against culnerable Congresscritters, to appeal to the Congress's self-preservation instinct and try to make it stronger than their desire to do something, anything, that would help move things along.

Our education opinions start with Mr. Merola almost throwing up a shaggy dog story about religion in school, only to settle down into the argument that education is discriminating aganist only Christians when it comes to religious expressions, and that this is "one-sided censorship" that shouldn't be tolerated. The example he cites is of a teacher required to remove phrases such as "One Nation Under God" as possible Establishment Clause violations, while keeping in place philosophers such as Mahatma Gandhi, Malcolm X, and the Dalai Lama. That all of them are religious has no real bearing on the point, so long as their sayings weren't advocating for their religion. There were also a string of prayer flags, where his argument actually holds some water, so he's not totally off base, to be fair. Where he finally gets to (and could have spent a lot less words getting there) is that the idea of "sepration of Church and State" has been hijacked from its original meaning, using techniques employed by COMMUNISTS! to reinterpret freedom of religious expression as a violation of the Establishment clause. (Now you see why I class it an almost-shaggy dog story. It does have a point, it just takes forever to get there.)

Running down the worst people in the world, The 11th Circuit Court of the United States gets a nod for having potentially said it is legal for the government to grab your e-mail from your ISP as soon as that e-mail has been delivered. What part of the Fourth Amendment did this Court not understand?

Going one up from there, though, are Senators McCain and Lieberman, presenting a bill to Congress that would allow the military to arrest anyone as a suspected terrorist, hold them indefinitely, and deny them their Miranda rights for the purpose of their detention. Blame to spread a-plenty, though, as the President is proving to be a little less than wonderful about greater oversight of intelligence agencies, too.

And getting out of opinions, Mr. Kotkin says the United States will do great in the years to come because we're going to have a rising birthrate, as opposed to everyone else, and that rising birthrate makes us just that more awesome.

Last for tonight, pictures of icebergs carved by nature, as opposed to staged pictures of wildlife for various magazines, and an unholy fusion of Egg McMuffin and McDouble burger, the Mc10:35, only available at said time because the transition between breakfast and lunch is at the right moment that one could get the last of the breakfast sandwiches and the first of the burger.

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L O D S O F E M O N E! What's that spell!? LOADS OF MONEY! Prob'ly! )

Download link:
"Pocket full of Dosh", "Loadsamoney", etc.
 
 
 
 
 
 
A friendly reminder to all my readers!

March 22nd marks the beginning of the 79th annual Feast of Shatmoy, that blessed time of year when we mark the Nativity of the Kirk and the Spock. The Kirk was born on March 22nd, 1931, and the Spock on March 26th, 1931.

In these hurried times, most of us can only manage a single Feast of Shatmoy observation, but in simpler days the Feast of Shatmoy spanned five full nights. Each had a different theme….


First Night – The Glory of Shatmoy
The feast begins on the evening of March 22nd, with the traditional consumption of a glazed ham and pirogues, followed by a screening of Amok Time and/or This Side of Paradise. Montreal smoked ham is also appropriate, though hard to come by in some places. The first night of Shatmoy is a time for appreciation of the genesis of Shatmoy, the golden era of promise and wide-eyed hope.

Second Night – The Dark Times
March 23rd is the night when we remember the long, dark Trekless decade between 1969 and 1979. If a meal is served, it is simple and economical - A tin of flaked ham and some matzo, perhaps. Some use this time for mourning, and wail along to Shatner’s Tambourine Man and Nimoy’s Bilbo Baggins while dressed in torn red shirts. Others choose to symbolically warm themselves around a candle while screening episodes of the animated series, or reading aloud from Alan Dean Foster novelizations.

Third Night – The New Dawn
On March 24th, the mood becomes festive. This is a day of celebration, in memory of the golden age of the films. Rather than having a formal dinner, friends gather to play Star Fleet or one of the RPGs and eat gooey handfuls of warm fiddlefaddle. (Fiddlefaddle has no significance in canon, but it’s good!) Others prefer to watch a marathon of the first six films late into the night. At the very least, a screening of The Wrath of Khan is in order. (Handy tip: Keep tissues on hand. Even the most jaded fans will weep during this film!)

Fourth Night – Passing the Torch
March 25th is marked by screenings of Generations, and mediations on Kirk’s final sacrifice. Favourite selections from the later television series are also appropriate. Earl grey tea and omelettes (as prepared by Kirk in the film) are traditional fare, so some choose to make this a morning celebration. Celebrants use this day to reflect on the passage of time. It can be a bittersweet occasion, but one should strive to focus on the positives – good memories, good friends, and so on.

Fifth Night – Look Forward
All good things must come to an end. Until recently, the final night of Shatmoy was simply marked by a re-screening of favourite episodes from the original series, along with a pleasant dinner of cold ham sandwiches. Others preferred to watch a selection of fan-made New Voyages. Modern celebrants often screen (and nitpick) the most recent film, and toast what may be Nimoy’s final appearance as Spock with a glass of Romulan ale (or something else alcoholic with blue food colouring in it).

However you mark Shatmoy, may it be a time of living long and prospering.
 
 
 
 
 
 

If I have to delete one more comment with a paragraph like, "Ha ha, that same thing happened to me when I tried to fix my bathroom plumbing, HREF=SPAM-PLUMBERS-INFO-VIAGRA-UK", I'm gonna stab somebody in the face. I am so sick of playing whack-a-mole with these.

Turning on captchas didn't even help, because these spams are apparently all entered by actual humans, who are making an effort to appear to be on topic if you don't read the URLs.

At this point, with the useless lack of tools provided by Livejournal to address this problem, my only choices are to disallow commenting from non-friends (in which case I might as well stop using LJ) or moderate comments from non-friends (which is even more work than deleting spam).

The only thing that has so far prevented me from giving up on LJ and hosting this blog myself is that I think I would get less comments. Maybe that's not even true any more, with all the tumbleweeds blowing through this site.

Mostly the spam happens on posts that are months old, presumably because they have more google juice. I'd be ok with just turning off comments on old posts -- except that when you turn off comments on an LJ post, all the existing comments disappear.

I think the first time I submitted a support request to LJ to make it possible to turn off new comments without hiding old ones was in 2003. Apparently adding new "valentine's day gift" logos has remained a higher priority than spam fighting.

So if you know anybody who still works at Livejournal, please stab them in the face.

 
 
 
 
 
 
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God dammit!

So last night I didn't sleep at all, and about 3:00 I just said fuck it and went in to work since it gives me hours of dark and quiet to really get stuff done.

About 7:00 I was finally tired and went out to nap in the car for a bit.

I keep a blanket and pillow in there for exactly this reason, since I routinely have insomnia and this happens regularly.

When I woke up, I found that a co-worker saw my car, saw my computer running, and snuck out to see if I was in it. Then he posted a picture on the car window of a grizzled homeless guy with a cigar:



There will of course be hellish retribution, I just haven't decided what yet.

>:(

*fistshake*
 
 
 
 
 
 
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OOC -- I want a word (preferably English, though I'd take other languages if I had to) which can be spelled in hexadecimal numbers and ends in UL or LU (for Unsigned Long).  For example, CUL: it's one hex digit (C) plus UL, and is a word in French. Unfortunately, it's a rude word, and I want this to go in a technical manual, so I'd prefer something that's not rude.
Hex digits: 0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,A,B,C,D,E,F.  You can use, say, 0 for o and 7 for t, but the best answers will not rely too much on this.

Bonus points: if the 0x symbol that goes in front of it makes it funnier, like 0xBEEF for a hex (signed integer) literal, or, um, 0xCUL even.

Reward: The one I like best will get into a formal language manual as an example of an unsigned long integer literal!
 
 
 
 
 
 
Poll #1539692 The Gender Poll
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: None, participants: 61

What gender are you?

Female
19 (31.1%)

Male
32 (52.5%)

Gender neutral
3 (4.9%)

Transgendered
1 (1.6%)

Other
6 (9.8%)

 
 
 
 
 
 
I/we have a cat for the next week and a half. He made the most pathetic noises on the way down here, but after about twenty minutes figure out nothing was going to kill him and he started relaxing and now he's got the usual feline "This is my house and if you're nice I'll let you stay here" attitude going.
 
 
 
 
 
 
Well, its official. I now have a train ticket. Only in Boston for one whole day now, which is shorter than I anticipated - travel agent had delayed the flight out of Ireland. On the plus side, it does mean I can take my time getting down from the north of Ireland down to Dublin. Taking the 2hr longer train trip, but saving $400 - well worth the 2 hours I'm guessing. And I get a glorious 6 hours to kill in the Chicago train station. Now that will be fun.

Now I just have to figure out how and when I get from the Silicon Valley area up to Seattle, then I start worry about where I'm going to sleep at all of these places and I'll be set.
 
 
 
 
 
 
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It's weird. The thing I'm looking forward to most about moving is designing my ideal workspace. I want to do it right this time instead of just "making due" like I have been doing for the last several years (oh god, it's been over 5 and I've had the same crappy hand-me-down corner desk...save me!), so fortunately there's cheap furniture stores like Ikea that can make this all possible for a decently inexpensive price.

I'm a living room worker. Even if I had my own "office" space, chances are, I'll end up in the living room. I have to be in the central point of the house where all the action happens. It's close to the kitchen, chances are there's a TV in there, I don't feel isolated, and I can work WHILE people commune in this friendly space. I paint in the living room, I draw, I even do my day job stuff (I work from home, and guess what, I'm always in the living room! I rarely sit at my desk. My desk is currently an unhappy, small, pointed at the wall place). Fortunately, [info]skorzy knows this and is completely supportive of me setting up shop in the living room, but feels I should have my own "space" that meets /all/ or at least most of my needs in order to keep my mess out of the common areas as much as possible. I think that's awesome! Him being around so many of you artists with all your individual working habits has benefitted me greatly in this regard :D

So whatever workspace I make for myself will have to fit in the living room.
I have a big computer monitor (read: one you can see from space, flatscreen) and my laptop, which I'll hook my laptop up to the monitor, so no need for tower space, but I would need room enough to paint next to my computer (yes, I do this, yes, I'm careful) but I need space to lay all my crap down so it's within easy access while I work. An issue I had while working on "Frostbite" at my computer was that I didn't have enough space to lay the actual piece flat on the desk itself (i used a wooden lap desk instead) and my colored pencils kept falling off of my desk (and it wasn't like I was using a lot of colors!)

Here are some other points I would enjoy in my workspace:
-Big, deep table with enough space for me to push back my monitor, have room for my laptop to lay flat (or flip up if the monitor's not hooked up to it) and enough room to paint at my desk.
-Table is low enough that I don't have to pump my chair up to ungodly heights to reach it.
-Preferably a swing out rack for my keyboard but I might have to build that myself
-A small, stand up mirror so I can observe my own facial expressions for drawing purposes /at/ my work station (instead of running into the bathroom and coming back out like I do now)
-Shelving
-Either pointable at the TV OR big enough for a small tv monitor to be put on the desk itself (or a separate stand in front of it?) if it has to be put against the wall (like a 20" or less screen, my dad has one in his office because he has similar habits to me and OMG..it solves a lot of TV related issues lol)
-2 desk lamps so I can set up light studies in the far corner of the desk , also, 2 lamps = non directional lighting for working!

This, the EXPEDIT desk/bookshelf set, (Yay Ikea!) almost fits the bill of what I want in terms of style and function, but even after seeing it in person I'm not certain that the desk itself is deep enough for my purposes:


The desk itself is $50, the bookshelves are sold separately (the shelf amount shown is $159, but they have smaller shelves for as low as $70), but the desk attaches directly to them in this case

What I can probably do is hack it with another black/brown table that's deeper, but I like those shelves (and they're also the same style we're looking at for the living room entertainment center) but the issue in that case is unless I can omit the "legs" on the other side of the table and attach it directly to the shelves like the photos shows, I'm paying $159 for use of only half the shelves because the others will be blocked by the table legs. Alternate shelving instead? Put the smaller shelf next to the desk which is essentially just a big table? Any suggestions on this from you Ikea aficionados, I'd love to hear it!

ANYWAYS! Artists, people who use your desk as your ultimate command center, what does your workspace look like? Photos, suggestions, etc, I wanna hear em! I wanna do it right this time around when it comes to organizing my workspace, and I'm sure a lot of you have thought of some clever things I couldn't even fathom when it comes to saving space and making the most out of your work area.
 
 
 
 
 
 
I am going to create a new character. A red Congressional devil-fox. I will name it Demon Pass.

With the power vested in him, Demon Pass will single-handedly smite the entire nation with unaffordable, ineffective health insurance. All while staying floofy. :)
 
 
 
 
 
 

When horses urge towel re-use, I listen.

So far at this year's SXSW music festival, no plea has found firmer purchase with me than these horses' request that I reuse my towels.

Normally I find signs like this one -- now standard in hotel bathrooms -- to be grating. "Do whatever will make you most comfortable. Just know that when you make us replace your towels, you're killing Earth," seems to be the message. Blatantly missing is any acknowledgment that if I choose to reuse my towels, I'm saving my hotel save on laundry costs. It feels quite disingenuous, IMO. And it usually results in my using a different towel on each limb -- one for each arm, each leg, hair, penis, etc. I'll use a large towel to clean my eyeglasses, then put it in the trash can, so as to leave no doubt about whether I intend to reuse it.

This sign, though, found in our Austin Holiday Inn Express's bathroom, has an altogether different effect on me, though. You can easily argue that it's self-serving for a hotel to discourage use of its laundry services. But these horses? What the hell do they stand to gain from your towel reuse? Only one thing: the continued sanctity of the forest where they live, the field where they nibble wild grass & clover, the cave where they take their mistress, the stream where they guzzle and launder their towels, the path where they trot, and the air through which they toss their mane. When a horse asks you to please reuse your towels, it's tough to turn him down. It's tough to keep wiping your butt with the big bath towels; instead, maybe you wipe your butt with a hand towel -- more than sufficient.

Anyway, at least for now -- at this hotel, for the next couple of days -- I intend to minimize the amount of towel laundry I require. I'm not doing it for the Holiday Inn Express. No, I'm doing it for the horse on the far left -- Visconti.


 
 
 
 
 
 
Anyone have any recommendations for cheap flights in the US? I need to do a short inter-city flight, which in theory should be easy to get. I had a quick look, but the mighty G only gives me Australian flights and carriers, so I need to do some more serious digging.

Or maybe I'll think about getting the train again. Hmm...
 
 
 
 
 
 

Evil Dead done in 60 seconds with CLAY - 2010 from Lee Hardcastle on Vimeo.

 
 
 
 
 
 
Convergence Report

End Of Line.
 
 
 
 
 
 
Sunny and nearly 70°F this afternoon. Planned a day of geocaching up around Souderton so that I can hit the Groundhog Day - Six Weeks Later geocaching event in the evening. What actually happened was I entered the area and just went from nearest cache to next nearest cache and spent most of the day in Hatfield and Montgomeryville, where the cache density was pretty high.

Headed over to the Souderton Pizza Hut in the evening for the event. We were actually early because only Unnamed, the host, was there when we arrived, but everyone else came in soon after. It wasn't a big event. Only about a dozen or so local geocachers attended, but that's a good thing because the restaurant wasn't very big. We had the pizza buffet. I had pizza, more pizza, and salad. (Well, the salad's in there somewhere!)

After dinner, we went for a few more geocaches, picking off the ones that were doable at night in Souderton and Telford. Encountered one nasty local individual at a cache site. I've seen his type a number of times in Long Island and New Jersey, so I have enough experience to know how not to escalate. From what I've heard, they are often not liked by their own communities, so pity the people who have to deal with them every day.

The caches... )
 
 
 
 
 
 
Today or yesterday as I suppose it was was really hard.

*soft silence*

I have a lot to do and not the slightest idea what some of it is. I have a difficult time squeezing in the stuff I know I need to do in between the mourning and the confusion and the wishing which are most often rolled into one.

There's one thing I think I want, but there's no direct line to it. If there were, I'd take it. I suspect that many, many would also.

I screwed up my 20's and 30's by not being aware of and focused on what I really wanted then and would want later. I got strung out in so many unbelievably stupid directions. I was so lost. One person sat me down and sought to guide me and I swear to god/ess I wish I'd listened. I was too headstrong and too caught up in new and exotic. I tell you exotic is nothing like home. Nowhere near as valuable as a beautiful warm sweet home. It's a great place to visit and I spose if you could find someone to set up a home with there it would be a beautiful place, but the best places have a home and a someone (though sometimes if/when necessary that someone can be a strong self). For me at this point, I'd like to know a place with a someone, a my someone, a someone who loves me as theirs. When I love it's strong. It's maybe too strong. It's definitely too strong to get into with the wrong someone. I did that to my 20's and 30's. I wish to anything and everything I hadn't. Now, I'm living out the consequences and I don't like them. And I'll be honest. A big part of it was that I was stoned. I had plenty of pain to anesthetize myself from, but it did me no better. I wish I'd been stronger to see what was what. To understand time and windows of opportunity. I wish I'd been braver. I wish I'd been able to see myself as valuable and deserving of good stuff. I wish I'd had faith that there was good stuff out there or that I could find it and get it and have it and live it. I wish someone could have helped me. I slipped through the cracks. An open heart that went from one bad place to isolation to another bad place. I was taken advantage of and I didn't have the faith in myself as a self that could or should have good things. I didn't even see them or believe in them. I was terrified of the smallest things - even though I was and am frightfully strong in lots of ways. I'm so sorry that I let myself down. I'm so sorry that I let myself stay caught up in bad things, bad people. I'm so sorry that I didn't know. I didn't know or see things in the ways that W sees them. I loved, but didn't see or believe in me receiving love. I didn't know to fight for and protect and search out certain qualities. I didn't know that I would be respected for demanding certain things 'til A told me that's what strong and 'hot' people expect and want. I took what I was given from stronger less tenderhearted people who were out to take and manipulate. I believed the promises of mean and selfish heartless people. I wasn't raised to expect or want much for myself. I wasn't raised that anyone wanted or expected much for me. I was raised and socialized by peers to believe that I was horrible, unlovable, wretched and barely tolerable. I was told I couldn't do anything right and would be lucky to go to McDonald's University. My role model of hetero-coupling and marriage was one of no affection except for the one time I saw my father hold my mother's hand at an amusement park. It was of verbal and physical abuse. Lying, fighting, ignoring and cheating. Of my mother hanging in there trying to be the perfect wife despite being mistreated and not treated at all. So, I didn't grow up wanting or working towards a hetero-coupling, marriage or a family. I didn't believe in the idea. I never saw it. The examples of male behavior I saw afterwards were not much better in highschool, in college, as a rape crisis counselor. Plenty of female behavior wasn't that great either. I was surrounded by drunken crassness, but never saw the appeal. Nor did I learn to pick my way through the mundane or the imperfect. Instead, I stayed in my own world - the only one that would have me since I was child. I later learned I could get there and stay there very easily smoking pot and the music was good there and the comfort in food was more tasty and more comforting... but the anesthesia was just as numbing and time kept passing and I didn't learn to fight. I didn't learn to see. I learned to smoke and pass out. I learned to escape. And really none of those serve for long.

I'm sorry life. I'm sorry sweet girl. I'm sorry I let you down and you will miss sooo much because it. I'm sorry honey. I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry. I can't apologize enough and even if I could... it doesn't make enough of a difference. But I am sorry. You deserved better. Way better. We/I tried. We did the best we could with what we had. I'm just so sorry I didn't find more. I'm sorry I didn't try again and again until I got it right. We didn't get enough of the right stuff. We had a lot of really good strong stuff - but we didn't direct it towards ourself. We didn't learn to and we didn't learn to learn to. We tried hard though. We just tried in the wrong directions. We tried for others. Others who would as DChild says "take advantage of your passion". We didn't learn to see through the takers and to flip through the rolodex of folks past them. We learned to hope and give second and twentieth chances and still hope. We learn to live off crumbs and that crumbs were all that would come. It's such a shame. I have so much more than crumbs to give. I'm picky. I wait and want to give to just the right person or that's what it seems except those people were the just the right person if kinds of people. That if never came. It didn't exist. I'm sorry honey. I'm so sorry. You would have been the most beautiful, amazing m. You would have, will be the most beautiful amazing w. Some day... I'm sorry life. I so hope that we get another one and that somehow a message gets back to this one this person that we get another one so that she can stop being so sad about how this one life turned out. I have been so very sad up to this moment. So very sad. Some of it is my fault for not finding what it would take to stop and get to something else. Some of it is as B put it.. I was dealt some very bad hands - that's for sure. I wish I'd been dealt better ones. I thought I almost was - I can't blame myself for that - but then it ended up being the same... They are perfect when they are not doing X. They are wonderful when they don't Y. It was very easy to see why I fell under his spell. What bunny especially a deprived, starved bunny such as myself could resist such a sweet, juicy carrot. If I could just get to it. If the carrot would just... I waited so long. 1 year and 9 months. Under such duress, anguish and stress. I marvel at it now that I'm at the end of even attempting any more even if I could or wanted to take any more I simply couldn't. I had to get off the merry go round.

Of all the things we could have done... I've never met anyone who loves as strongly, as faithfully, honestly and earnestly, as deeply, as tenderly, as wholly as I. It's not perfect - I have issues that I thought I'd conquered, but got kicked out of their graves. But it's there. It loves and loves and loves and loves with a strong back and big bright earnest trusting loyal loving eyes.

I wish so much for this love to be able to live in her fullest actualization.

I'm sorry, Sweetgirl. I didn't love you enough.
 
 
 
 
 
 

Comic will be up later in the evening, didn’t get it done on account of wedding anniversary. Spousal obligations preclude staying up half the night making funny pictures! I hope you will allow me this transgression, dear readers.

(it’ll so be worth it, though, I promise.)

Originally published at The Dawn Chapel. You can comment here or there.

 
 
 
 
 
 
One of my high school friends was fond of gambling, and loved to say, "No balls, no blue chips!" whenever he was making a big bet, or egging somebody else on to do so. I'm not sure if Obama took away any blue chips from this encounter, but he definitely had the balls. Bitch be trippin' balls, as the young folks are so fond of saying.



My thoughts: I came away only a little more confused than I did going in. Obama says that all the shady deals that were slipped in to help the Senate Bill pass are gone in the new one going through the House. Wouldn't that mean it's an entirely new Bill, and won't the Senators who were bought with all those deals feel a bit cheated? Does this mean union workers will now pay the "Cadillac Tax"?

I thought Bret Baier was a little rude. He interrupted several times while Obama was in the middle of answer him. It was slightly warranted in places, but... I unno, I'm used to reporters being a bit more deferential, the confrontational old lady from the White House Press Corps not withstanding. Somebody should check his passport, make sure he's not really British.

I still have no idea how they mean to pass this Bill. Of course, I'd prefer they not. Even with the dirty deals cut from the legislation, there's still plenty of execrable language that should be removed. We could do without the personal mandate, for example. Given my wishes, I say we give good old fashioned Federalism a try. Let any states that want a government health plan make one of their own, compare the relative merits of all those plans, then go to the Federal government when we have something that's been proven to work.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Wherein we are glitterbombed by tiny screaming Mexican cosplayers. Also, cream pie.

 
 
 
 
 
 
[info]brandywilliams just gave me this link in a comment, and I wanted to make sure people could see it:

The Cult of Done Manifesto

I love it. It's awesome. Every writer should read it (especially #8), and I LOVE #10 and #11. So true.

And, finally, the punch line to the whole thing, #13.

Read it. Even if you aren't a writer, but someone else who gets stuff done--or wants to.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Every year, right about this time, something big and due east across Lake St. Clair from here goes up in flames. For anywhere between two days to over a week, the eastern sky is smudged with soot-colored smoke. It has to be either somewhere in the middle of the lake or in Canada, but I've not been able to find any readily available information about it. You'd think a fire that burned for a week would make the news, but not a peep. People I talk to about it are mostly clueless that it's even there, and don't even express interest in going to see it when I point out that the otherwise clear blue sky is blackened by smoke. I sometimes feel like I'm the only kid living in Derry who realizes that Pennywise the Clown is really a child-eating monster.